Remembering to live
A spring awakening is coming.
It’s 10:36am on Monday 2nd March and I’m writing this from my favourite coffee shop in SE LDN. The sun is shining through the window, the coffee is strong, the sky is blue and there is a palpable feeling that Spring is finally coming into bloom.
To begin, a confession:
I had planned to write this Substack at the weekend, so I could prioritise ‘real work’ on Monday morning.
But then I remembered something so excruciatingly simple, it is often overlooked.
I remembered to live.
Blooming into Spring
If you follow me here, or on IG, or are one of my beloved MOOD members, you may have noticed there’s a real theme emerging in my work this season.
A theme of vitality.
As with most of my work, it’s been largely inspired by two things:
Observing my members: noticing their challenges, their blocks and the fears that are most present for them.
Observing myself, and the transformations I experience that yield the most transformative results.
And let me tell you, a shift has occurred.
I have already spoken about the retreat I was lucky enough to go on last November. The thing I love about retreats, is that they really do have the power to create these quantum leap moments. You arrive as one person, and very often leave as an entirely new version of yourself.
And through experience, I’ve learnt that this is what creates the biggest changes.
It’s not your strategy, your plan or even your action that creates the best results.
It’s your identity.
January was also my best financial month in my business ever, even after taking 3 weeks off in Mexico over Christmas. So I literally have the receipts to prove it.
Your beliefs, your thoughts, your emotions, your frequency, your energy - they all matter and are shaping your experience of life, whether you’re conscious of it or not.
The world is a mirror.
Reality is you, pushed out.
You can’t look in the mirror and will or force the reflection to change.
But you can change yourself, and watch as the reflection conforms.
Life works in a similar way.
And what really became obvious to me on last year’s retreat, was just how much I’d been moving through life, without truly living.
I’d eat food without really tasting it.
Be in nature without noticing it.
Work tirelessly doing busy work, yet never feel like it was enough.
I was doing, instead of being.
In hindsight, I realise I spent the first 12 months of my business in a hyper alpha masculine mode.
Building, forcing, striving, struggling, desperately trying to prove and validate myself.
I shut myself off from the world.
Opted out of socialising.
And reserved every weekend for working.
I left the corporate world behind, but the corporate world hadn’t left me!
Now, I’m not saying that this level of dedication can’t be helpful.
This applied focus and consistency enabled me to build MOOD organically at a pace that I’m proud of.
But what got me here, won’t get me there, and what I’ve realised is that during this time I became disconnected.
From my vitality
my desires
my pleasure
my creative authenticity
and the feminine life force that is alive within me.
A realisation that only became obvious through taking a step back from the day to day, and transporting myself into a powerful container, in Portugal, on retreat, sat in isolation on the cool damp earth of the forest floor, and moving daily through a series of embodied practices that brought me fully back…
Out of my head, and into my body.
Becoming the Alive Woman
As for my incredible MOOD members, I’ve noticed a pattern that keeps repeating.
The immense amount of pressure they often feel and put themselves under.
Pressure to get it right, to be perfect, to have all the answers, to have their new ideas make money yesterday, to be clever, to be impressive, to be who they think they need to be, instead of simply allowing themselves to be who they really are.
It’s the trap of conditioning that captures us all.
But the irony is real, because…
You can have success, and still feel flat.
You can be wealthy, and still feel poor.
You can be productive, and still feel disconnected.
Vitality is different.
Vitality is about feeling more alive inside your own life.
It’s life force, desire, clarity and deep embodied presence.
It’s allowing yourself to bloom unapologetically into the fullest version of yourself, before the world taught you how to think, how to feel, who to be.
Vitality begins with desire. Not obligation.
It’s not about asking:
What should I want?
How should I behave?
What should I have achieved by now?
Authentic desire is an energy that moves through you naturally.
Maybe you felt this more when you were younger. You reached for what felt good. You were curious. You were expressive. You were playful.
But somewhere along the way you were taught to distrust it. Told to be sensible, realistic, please other people, do the right thing, be a good girl, be productive, be better, be perfect.
So overtime, desire got replaced with duty.
And you learnt to turn off the tap to your creative, sensual aliveness.
So you minimised yourself and your needs,
You softened your voice
Repressed your femininity
And shrank your power
But if you’ve read this far, chances are you already feel it.
The pull to return to your wildish nature.
To be the woman you came here to be.
Not the polished, filtered version.
The one who is raw, uncensored and brimming with vitality.
The Alive Woman is not driven by pressure.
She is moved by what feels true and alive within her.
And as the sky turns blue, a symbolic promise that brighter, better days lie ahead, I urge you to ask yourself:
When do I feel most alive in my current life?
Where have I been choosing obligation over desire?
How might my life change if I gave myself permission to live, not just simply exist?
If you’re tired of playing it small, want to unlock the feminine life force that lives within you, and allow yourself to bloom fully and authentically into your true power this month, I’m opening up some spaces inside our 90-Minute Interactive Feminine Embodiment Experience: SPRING AWAKENING, next Monday 18:00-19:30 (replay available).
This is not a workshop.
This is an initiation.
A remembering.
A return to aliveness.
A 90-minute immersive experience designed for women who are already building, leading, creating: but know they cannot build a beautiful life from burnout.
Inside this initiation, you will:
• Reclaim the energy you’ve been unconsciously leaking
• Stop overriding your own instincts
• Reconnect to your sensual aliveness
• Release the pressure to “get it right”
• Embody the calm, magnetic woman who trusts herself
• Begin building your life from vitality, not burnout
This is not about becoming someone new.
It is about remembering who you are beneath the noise, the hustle, and the expectations.
The Alive Woman is not louder.
She is calmer.
Clearer.
More rooted in herself.
Imagine how much your life could change if you woke up every morning feeling full of energy, gratitude, excitement and abundance.
In my experience, the more I connect to my vitality, the better, funner and easier life becomes.
The ripple effects are profound.
I can’t wait to share this with you.
SPRING AWAKENING
Monday 9th March, 6–7:30pm (live on Zoom - replay available).
Free for MOOD members / £33 for non-members.
With love,
Lauren